“A friend in need is a friend indeed”-maybe I am just not cut out for friendships…

Hi y’all! How are you doing? How has your week been so far? For me, I have been really stressed and some things aren’t really going well. I have a lot of things going well but there are still a lot of things not going well. Anyway, my trust remains in God. Tribulations will come but because I have God, I shouldn’t fear because He has overcome the world for me. God is good y’all. By the way, today’s post is me being very real and very honest. Let’s just get into it.

Friendship has always been a struggle for me. Well, it didn’t start being a struggle until I moved to America; that’s when it all changed. To be honest, moving to America is one thing that has really really affected my life till now. My life just turned around, both in good and bad ways- you can read about it in my blogpost “What I went through moving from Nigeria to America”.

After I first moved to America, I became a very very shy person who has lost all her confidence. America is so different because it’s not only black people here, it’s a combination of all types of people. I was not used to that; I was used to being surrounded by black people and I wasn’t even aware of my blackness. To cut the long story short, the school I first attended when I got to America didn’t have a lot of black kids and the area I live in is a white-dominated area. It was really difficult for me to be myself because I just couldn’t relate to the people around me.

Since I lost my confidence, it was really really hard for me to make friends, infact I didn’t make any friends. I was alone and even though, it made me feel really somehow, I was comforted because I always thought that I had friends in Nigeria. The “friends in Nigeria” thing is like another story of its own. I’ll just tell y’all the summary of it.

I just realized that there are really no friends in Nigeria anywhere. Although I had a lot of friends in Nigeria when I was still there, I didn’t realize that they would all have moved on with their lives(**stops writing here and cleans imaginary tears**). Even the person I called best friend had gotten another best friend and I looked like a big fool still calling her my best friend. Anyway, it’s fine and I don’t blame any of them because it’s kinda selfish for me to expect them to put their lives on hold. They have their lives to live and they can’t put it on hold because of me.

By the way, these “friends in Nigeria” still text me but there’s really no connection there anymore for most of them. Yes, we all talk and text sometimes but it doesn’t feel like before anymore when we were all really close. Long story short, I am kinda “friendless” right now and I lowkey love it. Okay, “friendless’ might be too strong and too harsh. Yeah but according to my own definition of friendship, I really am kinda friendless right now. Also, a lot of people would say that I’m not friendless but I feel friendless(argue with your phones 😂). Anyway, I am able to focus more on myself and do a lot of things that I want to do. I think that’s better for me, right?

Also, I recently had an experience with someone who wanted to be my “friend”. He is a really nice person but it’s just that I feel like I don’t even know how to be a friend anymore. I don’t even entertain friendships anymore because I just think I am not cut out for friendship. I guess that’s fine because I am thriving on my own and I am doing really fine being by myself(*lies but let’s just leave it alone*).

In all, truth is that friendships now confuse me because I’ve seen that people seem to get too attached easily. I am not the best with that, so I don’t know how to deal with a “friend”. Man, I really don’t know. It is well sha. I have God with me. By the way, I really am fine. Please don’t comment “sorry” or anything like that.

Just let me know what you think about friendship in the comment. Do you think you are cut out for friendship? Are you like me when it comes to friendship? Let me know your thoughts in the comments. Don’t be scared or shy to leave a comment, this is a judgment-free zone.

Photo by Emre Can on Pexels.com

Just look at this picture; see how nice the set-up is. That’s all for today y’all. Bye:) Don’t forget to leave a comment!

“Attachments”|why do people get attached too easily?..

Hello people! How are y’all doing? I really hope y’all are fine. For me, I have been okay. There’s nothing really interesting going on for me. I have just been trying to take a break from Instagram and WhatsApp. It’s not really easy but I’m doing really good so far. Prayerfully, I am able to stay off these apps till the end of October. Anyway, let’s get into today’s post.

I am just going to start off by telling you guys about this story. I remember when I went for a Model U.N ‘competition’ from school. I partnered with this very outgoing and cheery girl; for Model U.N, it’s better if you are in partners. So, this girl kept going around talking to the other people there; there were a lot of students from different countries there. She was asking for almost everyone’s numbers and taking pictures with them. Throughout the whole thing(it was for three days), she just kept trying to make friends whilst still doing the work. I was just wowed and kinda annoyed because I thought it was all very unnecessary.

For me, I came there for an event/competition. I just wanted to do the thing, win, and get out of there. I really didn’t get the point of making friends with people you’ll probably never see again. One thing about me is that I really try to not get too attached to people. If I collected all those peoples’ numbers, I probably won’t even text them again, so what was the point of getting attached? I really don’t get it.

This whole attachment thing is also the reason why I don’t make friends anymore and I don’t accept friend requests. Like I just don’t like it when people are too close and all up in my business. I really don’t get people, to be honest. How can you just meet someone and you are already all up in their business, texting them everyday, and calling them every time. People truly confuse me. Another thing I really don’t get is those people on social media who dm you trying to be friends. I’m like, how do you ask someone to be your friend when you only just saw them on social media?? I feel like a lot of people don’t care but for me, I really care because it just makes no sense to me. I really don’t want unnecessary friendship. Sorry not sorry y’all(this is so mean😭).

I am not really good with friendship, so the people who are trying to make me their friend are really just disturbing themselves. Friendship for me has just become really weird and confusing over the years( y’all don’t worry, I have a blogpost about this coming up very soon).

So, I want to know what y’all think about attachments. Why do y’all think people get attached too easily? What do you think of the people who get too attached too easily? Do you think getting attached too easily is a good or bad thing? Let me know in the comments.

Photo by Oliver Sju00f6stru00f6m on Pexels.com

I really just like this picture. Bye y’all:) Don’t forget to leave a comment!