How do you become?

hi! How are you doing? I really hope you are doing ok?! If you’re not, I pray that things will become so much better very soon;)

For me, so much has been going on. I have felt so many emotions in the past few months and it has not been easy. But really, I have been well!

Let’s get into today’s post..

I have opened my WordPress account so many times in the past months, desperate to write something, to become that amazing and consistent writer I have always dreamed of. I have tried to think and think of what I can write so that I can get back to becoming that person I hope to become. All my attempts have failed and as much as I have tried to start writing again, I have not been able to. Now, I feel like I have “failed” myself and I can’t become that great writer that I have always envisioned myself being.

It feels like writing has failed me. Or maybe I have failed writing. I don’t know, maybe I am thinking too deep about it. Who knows?

However, something I know is that I like writing, so I am going to keep writing. Although, things get very hard sometimes, I am going to persevere and keep going.


That’s it. This post is supposed to be my come-back post on the blog. So, I am back on the blog and I will keep writing. Thank you so much to everyone who reads my posts, likes them, and also leaves nice comments on them.

Thank you for reading. I will see you in my next post!

byee:))

*Don’t forget that God loves you forever!

In New York City

So, I moved to New York City in 2017 and I’m pretty sure you already know that story(it was the first post I published on this blog). If you are new here and want to know that story, check here!

When I first moved here and in my first three years of being here, I didn’t know that New York City was a pretty big deal. I didn’t know that people really wanted to move here. I also didn’t know that it was a major place. I didn’t even know that New York City was a whole other part of New York.

I just didn’t know so much about New York City!

However, I have just now realized that New York City is a very big and major city! It’s a place where a lot of people want to live. It’s a place where you can just meet your favorite celebrity walking on the street(well, I guess only if you live in Manhattan). It’s a place where a lot of big companies are situated.

Simply put, it is a place where a lot of big things happen.

Honestly, it can be very intimidating sometimes but I think it’s very beautiful to live here and experience what it’s really like to be a “New Yorker”. I am just so fascinated by it and that’s probably why I’m so short of words and just going to stop here.

Honestly, the whole reason for this post is just to appreciate NYC and being able to live here. I know that NYC is so romanticized compared to what it really is like but just being able to live in this city gets me smiling. I don’t know, I just think about it so much and little excited firecrackers go off in my head.

I know I said that I really love Lagos and might want to move there in the future but it’s not looking so sure for Lagos right now. New York is really the vibe right now!

I’m just glad to be here and even though, I don’t want to live here forever, I can’t wait to have my own NYC studio apartment with floor to ceiling windows and so many plants and art surrounding my space..

Like you guys know, I’m always thinking of the future and constantly planning. So, as I go on in life and as I grow, I’ll come here frequently to update you!

With all that said, thank you for reading today’s post and thank you for being here on my blog!


Before I go, I’ve to say HI!

hii! How are you?! I really hope you are doing alright. I also hope you have been very kind to yourself:))

How am I doing? I am doing pretty okay. I have been quite busy trying to do a couple of things. I have been to trying to get through by reading list for the year. Overall, I am ok! Just glad to be writing here;))


Before you leave, enjoy this beautiful photos of New York City that I found on the free WordPress photo library!

byee!

-You can check out my YouTube channel here for a lot of NYC vlogs🧋🧋

*don’t forget that God loves you forever and that you should never say negative things to yourself!

Maybe I just love YouTube(maybe..)

I started watching YouTube not long ago and it has been very very fun. By watching YouTube and seeing people simply create, I have grown to love the art of creating videos and editing videos.

There is a lot of talent on YouTube and it is mind blowing. It is so beautiful to see people document different things that excite them, and also share those things out to the world. YouTube just makes me really smile and it has become a source of great motivation to me(surprisingly, if I am being honest).

Earlier before I got so into YouTube, I didn’t think of creating videos and editing them but now, I really just want to do that. I have “fallen in love” with the art of making videos, filmmaking(if I want to be bold). I don’t know how to explain it, to be honest; YouTube has just captured my heart.

I feel like this is because it’s really only on YouTube where you see people post long videos, documenting different things. YouTube is fun, and that’s basically what this blogpost is about.

Due to my new love for making and creating videos, I “recently” got my own YouTube channel. It’s been really great, honestly. Seeing the videos that I made and edited on such a popular platform where anybody and everybody has access to it just makes me feel proud of myself a little. I feel like I am growing in a way and just really learning more about the things that really make me smile.

So yeah, I’ve got my blog, my podcast, and now my YouTube. It’s a little scary putting myself out there on the Internet but I love that I am going after things that I really want to do(for now). It makes me feel “fulfilled” in a way:)


I had a totally different post planned for today but I decided to share with you guys, my love for YouTube instead. Yeah, it’s fun-this is the only word I can literally think of!

Anyway, hi everyone!! How are you doing? I really hope you are doing alright! If you are not, please don’t stop trusting in God no matter what! God has got you forever, so you will be fine! Keep trying to stay positive:)

For me, I am doing better now. I have been busy with school and just preparing for different exams, and things to do for the summer. So yep, I am living:))


Thank you for reading this post today! I will see you in my next blogpost:))

Photo by Burst on Pexels.com

I searched for a New York photo and this came up; so enjoy this beautiful photo of New York.

byee!!

*don’t forget that God loves you forever and that you should always do the right thing, not the easy thing!!

A mini life update + podcast re-branding + YouTube channel

Hello everyone! How are you doing?! I hope you are staying safe and trying to keep your head up high! If you are not doing okay, please do not stop trusting God and keep trying to be positive. All will be okay, even when it really does not seem like that!

It really feels like it has been a while since I have been on here and I feel very bad about that. A lot has happened though and I removed all my followers here on the blog- this was an okay decision, by the way. I honestly kind of want to start again and start afresh-like a new beginning. I am also thinking of a new name for the blog. So yeah, that is what is up with the blog.

How am I really doing?! No worries, I will be talking about it a little bit here.

Mini life update

Okay, so, I have not really been okay which explains my absence here on the blog. This year has been a lot on me but my trust remains in God and I know that everything will be okay. Yeah, so I took a halt on my blog and podcast for the majority of January and I recently came back at the end of January. I honestly do not want to give up, so here I am fighting to keep going despite everything I am going through.

I have had a lot of bad days this year and it has been very not nice because whenever I go through that kind of day, I really don’t want to get out of bed and I just want to sit alone in a dark room. It’s not nice at all but I am fighting and trying to keep my head up high and to keep being positive; it has not been easy but I just have to keep fighting for myself, you know. That’s the life update:))

Podcast Re-branding

Alright, about my podcast re-branding that I told you all about some time ago, it’s been a mess. Due to all I am going through, I honestly took a halt there too. Although most of the work has already been done, I still have to catch up all the posts from the old Instagram page on the new Instagram page and that really is all that is left. This is not even hard to do, I have just not been able to get myself to do it but I will take it one thing at a time, and by the end of February, hopefully I will be done.

By the way, if you do not already know about this, I have a podcast called, “Talkative and Christian”. It is a podcast that is majorly about self-improvement, raising awareness on different controversial issues, and faith(Christianity). If you are interested, you can go to anchor.fm/talkativeandchristian. Thank you!

YouTube channel

I have a YouTube channel! It’s called “Barakat Jay” on YouTube. You can go check out my YouTube channel if you would like and while you are there, please subscribe and watch the videos. Thank you!

This is something I am really excited about and I hope it really works out amazingly well:))

Well, that is all for today’s post. I just wanted to update you all and get back on here to start writing again. As always, thank you for your support, I really appreciate it.

You can leave a comment, introducing yourself to me! I want to know more about my readers! Also, tell me how you are really doing in the comments.

I will see you all later! Byee!!

Don’t forget that God loves you forever and that you are never alone:))

Answering some of my frequently-asked questions

Starting today’s post with this🤗
Not just today, every single day!!

Hii people! HAPPY NEW YEAR!! I really hope we are all doing great! If you are not, please try to keep your head up, and don’t forget that you always have God by your side. God deeply cares for you and He is aware of everything that you are going through, so you will be fine. Yes, you will because God says so!🤍🤍

So, how am I? I am pretty good. School has resumed, and I am just so glad that the school year is going fast, and that it’s almost the end of the school year. Exciting stuff!! Also, I am working on my podcast rebranding; when it’s done, I will come here and give y’all all the gist! I have been working on myself, and my relationship with God. You know, it’s a new year, it’s a fresh start for me. That’s about it!

Ohkayyyy. Let’s dive in to today’s post! Shall we..

Today, I am going to be answering my most frequently-asked questions. This is lowkey exciting because a lot of people just ask me the same questions over and over, and also, it’s a way for me to semi-introduce myself to the new followers here. Welcome welcome, by the way! Just keep reading😊😊

1.)What is your real name?

This seems like some top secret but it’s not. My real name is Barakat. I have usually hidden it and go by different names for different reasons but that is over(hopefully i don’t regret it). So, there you go, I am Barakat. I also go by Bee and Precious. Bee is just like a nickname because a lot of people don’t know how to pronounce Barakat and Precious is my Christian name.

2) Do you even know what Barakat means?

YESS, of course, I know what Barakat means! Barakat is a Muslim name, and it means blessing.

I know now, you are probably wondering why I have a Muslim name if I am Christian. Yeaa, this is because my dad is Muslim, while my mum is Christian. Yep, that’s it, no long story.

3) I thought you were a Muslim, so why do you always talk about Jesus Christ?

Mann, if I saved a penny every time someone has said this to me, I think I will be tens of dollars richer. People always think I am Muslim because of my name. Yes, I have a Muslim name, and I already explained why above. Even though I have a Muslim name, I am Christian and will forever be. Yepp:)

4)Why did you move from Nigeria?

I moved because I wanted to. Simple as that. Infact, *drops MIC*😛😛

5)Why do you love Nigeria so much?

I love it so much because it is my home country, and it’s where I spent most of my life before now. Even though Nigeria has its faults, it is still my home country, and we all have to understand that every country has its faults. We just have to keep praying for every country! By God’s grace, things will be better soon for Nigeria, and everywhere. Amen!

6) Why don’t you want to have a boyfriend now?

This is a funny question, and it’s my second most-asked question. It’s simply because I am not interested in that now because I have other things that are much more important for my life. Also, as a Christian, I cannot and will not just date for fun. I will only date when God says it is time, and when I am ready for that kind of commitment. That’s it!

7) Why don’t you make friends?

See, when it’s supposed to happen, it will happen. Please you guys should stop stressing me! Besides, I do have people I talk to, so yeahh.

That’s about it! Please y’all should stop asking me these questions over and over! My tired is tired😩Anyway, thank you for reading!

If you have any thoughts or questions, you can leave a comment. I will catch you guys later, and HAPPY NEW YEAR, once again!

One of my fave pictures now! bye people!

Rooting for you all always, even on days when we fail to believe in ourselves, and understand that WE CAN DO IT!🤗🤗

I am soo stuck, tired, and exhausted..| Midnight struggles..

Hi y’all! How are you doing? I really hope you are doing alright:) If you really are not doing okay right now or you feel so lost and tired, I just want to tell you to please try to keep your head up! Sometimes, life just doesn’t feel great but I want you to tryyyy and keep moving and just please remember that no matter what’s happening to you currently, you will be fine eventually; even when it doesn’t feel like you’ll be fine, you’ll be, I promise and that’s because God says so! Please keep going🤍

So how am I doing? I guess from the title, you already kinda know how I am doing. Yeah, life is not going so great for me right now. I am just so all over, everywhere and I honestly don’t know how I really feel. I guess I just kinda feel lost somewhat but I am living. I am really trying to keep my head up and I am just going because I know that God definitely got me, so I will be alright!

Alright, let’s move onnn..

You know, today I was just thinking of how people see me from the outside. From what people tell me, and have told me, people see me as “perfect” from the outside. Like they think I am so hardworking, smart, intelligent, diligent, focused, and many more good stuff. This just feels so freaking weird because it’s like whyyyyyy and howwwwww? I literally don’t get it. Like, why do they think I am that person..

Honestly, I just lied to y’all! I actually get it. I get why they view me as that kind of person; it’s because that’s how I project myself to the outside world.

Heyyy, pause a minute! I am smart, intelligent, and so much more! Just wanted to get that straight!”

As I was saying, I mean, I don’t want people to see the ugly and dirty because just like every human, I guess I am scared of vulnerability. I don’t just want to expose myself to everyone, you know. I don’t want them to see the person behind all the “perfection” or “inspiration” they all see. I don’t want to open myself, I’d rather be in secret- this is not a good habit, by the way.

I have realized that we all do this. Literally everyone! We don’t like showing people the vulnerable parts of us and believe it or not but this is mostly because of fear. We are really scared of different things and this fear we have holds us back whenever we want to show people that we are also struggling. I don’t even know whether to call this normal because it’s not normal, it’s just what we have turned to normal. This is the reality, y’all:(

For real, I am not doing alright. I have been so tired, so lost, and just so done. There, I said it! I just broke my fear of vulnerability(woww moment!!!!) Anyway, I have just been thinking about the future a lot; my future actually and things are not going so well in my head right now. The funny thing is that, I don’t even know the source of my tiredness and exhaustion, I just don’t even know..

You know that feeling of not knowing how you feel, that’s kinda me right now.. Also, when I was planning to write this post, I was so gingered because I knew what I was going to write but I started writing and everything just flew away from head. So, I am not even sure if this blogpost makes any sense at all but hopefully it does.


One more thing.. Although, I am feeling like this, I am really really trying to keep holding onto God because I know that no matter what, He’s got my back and will always do because He is a great God. God is so good, y’all. Like every time I just feel so down, God tells me that I should remember that He says in His Word that He’s got me forever. Fam, God is so amazing! No matter what you are going through right now, please remember that God promised to never leave his beloved(YOU) alone, so He is with you always and you have to always remember that!

Before I go, I need to share this Bible verse with y’all.

Isiah 41 vs 10, says, “So do not fear, for I am with you;
    do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
    I will uphold you with my righteous right hand”

Please always remember that verse and always read it to yourself every time so that it really sinks in. God loves you!! That’s all for today!

Remember, our help comes from God! So, no matter what you’re going through, you’ll be okay!

Um, also I have kinda been struggling with consistency, hence why I have not been posting regularly but I am working to get back on my grind. Thank you still for always reading. God bless you!

Love you all always🤗🤗

Where do I really want to be| my “obsession” with Lagos?

Hi y’all! How’re you doing? I really hope y’all are doing fine. For me, I’m okay, really. I’m just living, you know. It’s thanksgiving season though and there’s so much to be thankful for, all thanks to God. Alright, let’s move on..

So just one word, LAGOS!! Man, I can almost say that I’m in love with Nigeria, Lagos especially. Honestly, I have been looked at somehow and I’ve been abused/ridiculed because of how much I love Lagos or let’s just say Nigeria. People call me stupid and weird because I tell them that I’d rather be in Nigeria than be in America. They say that I’m not appreciative and that I don’t know a good thing. Well, I’m not really offended or bothered because I totally understand where they’re coming from.

You know, America is supposed to be our dream and our goal that we are supposed to work so freaking hard to achieve. This is really a backward way of thinking if you’d ask me. A lot of people don’t appreciate the country that they’re born into because it’s not America. Before anybody comes for me, yes I know that America might seem better than our home country but really, it’s all the same. America is just better packaged.

It’s really sad that people almost worship and glorify America. You see people that literally don’t try and work hard in the country that they are born in because they think America is really where they are supposed to be. Another disclaimer here, Yes, I know that there are a lot of people work so so hard in their home country but their efforts are always wasted because of how damaged their country is but you don’t stop trying though. Keep trying and keep doing your best and the Lord will bless the work of your hands. Amen!

Honestly, there’s really nothing special about America, we’ve just been made to believe that. Yes, I know America is nice and it’s full of “opportunities” but have you tried exploring where you are to discover the opportunities available to you there?? See, there are opportunities in every country, you just have to be wise with it and don’t give up; you have to keep searching. The thing is that a lot of people sef don’t try to make do with what they have and use it to their advantage. For real!

I never knew that some things were possible or even available in Nigeria because I never searched or even tried to explore my surroundings for different opportunities. I was always so jealous of Americans because I didn’t know that I could do so many things there in Nigeria. Nigeria is full of different people doing different amazing things, so just search and do your research and I know you’ll find something. This is not only for Nigeria though, it’s for everywhere. Opportunities are all around you, you just need to snatch them one by one!

Alright, let’s get back to Lagos now. Lagos is a really really amazing place. It’s really sad how people tend to focus on all the negative parts of a place to even know that they’re a lot of positive parts to that place. Yes, believe it or not, even though Lagos has a ton of negative parts, there are still a ton of positive parts. Before I go on about Lagos, let me show y’all some pictures. These pictures are why people hate on me when I say that I want to move to Lagos.

Image number one. This is Makoko, a town built on water. I guess I put this picture because one of the reasons why people attack me is because they say the living conditions in Lagos are not the best. Yeah yeah but Lagos also has some of the best architectural buildings in Africa.
Image number two. Just focus on how much people there are in this photo; overpopulation is also why people attack me for liking Lagos. Lagos just like New York is overpopulated..

Let’s continue.. So, people don’t like Lagos because firstly, it’s not America🙄; secondly, it’s overcrowded; thirdly, it’s stressful and overwhelming. I understand that all of these are valid reasons, well except the first one. Lagos is overpopulated and there are so many different kinds of people there but that doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s a bad place. Also, Lagos life can be stressful and overwhelming because everyone in Lagos is looking for ways to make a living. Nigeria is the poverty capital of the world and most of these people are in Lagos. They’re in Lagos because Lagos is the place where a lot of opportunities are. People go to Lagos to make a life for themselves and all, so there are different types of people there. Man, if you’re not wise, you really can’t live in Lagos o because you’ll become so frustrated but let’s just leave that aside for now(I’ll talk about this in another post..).

So why am I so interested in Lagos? Why is Lagos where I really want to be? To me, Lagos is a source of motivation and Lagos is very inspiring. People intrigue me, so where’s the best place for people-watching if not Lagos. I just have this feeling inside of me that Lagos is where I would truly feel peace; like it’s where I’m supposed to be. I’m really not moved by America and all it’s fancy stuff; it’s nice but I really feel like I don’t belong here. Also, I really love the life in Lagos, the hustle and bustle, the persistence and zeal of the people, the beauty of the city that never sleeps. By the way, Lagos really means a lot to me. So, no Lagos slander is accepted on this blog. Also, I won’t say that I’m obsessed with Lagos, I’m just intrigued and fascinated by it.

That’s all for today y’all. Where is that place you really want to be? Where is that country, city, or state that you want to live in and you know that you would be at peace there? Let me know in the comments!

.p.s. I might end up not moving to Lagos but move to Ibadan instead . I don’t know yet sha..